Until now, EFT hasn’t had official recognition by psychological bodies, despite mounting piles of evidence to support its effectiveness. But now the American Psychological Association has recognised it as an ‘evidence-based’ practice. This recognises that while it’s not scientifically known exactly how it works, the evidence shows that it does work.

Here’s what the EFTUniverse.com site says:

News flash from EFTUniverse.com:

“This week we changed the EFT Research page to read as follows: “The current status of EFT as an “evidence-based” practice is summarized in this statement in the APA (American Psychological Association) journal Review of General Psychology: ‘A literature search identified 50 peer-reviewed papers that report or investigate clinical outcomes following the tapping of acupuncture points to address psychological issues. The 17 randomized controlled trials in this sample were critically evaluated for design quality, leading to the conclusion that they consistently demonstrated strong effect sizes and other statistical results that far exceed chance after relatively few treatment sessions. Criteria for evidence-based treatments proposed by Division 12 of the American Psychological Association were also applied and found to be met for a number of conditions, including PTSD.’ (Feinstein, in press)” This is sober academic language for a seismic shift in the geography of healing. For the past five years, we’ve worked incredibly hard, through unbelievable obstacles, to complete the research required to meet APA Division 12 standards. This milestone, published in an APA journal, marks a tipping point in EFTs credibility.”

The complete story at EFTUniverse Research.

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Most of us will have heard of the Law of Attraction, perhaps through the movie The Secret or the many books on the subject. Essentially, the law says that you attract into your life whatever you focus on. A whole industry has grown up around teaching people how to use the Law of Attraction (LoA) to manifest their desires and create anything from wealth to the perfect partner. Mastery of the LoA has become a spiritual goal in itself.

This communication of the LoA has done a lot to help people in disempowered or victim states realise that they can change their lives for the better. They can focus on the positive rather than the negative, and they can expect things to change because of this. And it works. Kind of.

Some people do make a lot of money and attract the ideal partner and whatever else they want, but others don’t. Can we really be sure this is because the successful people are doing it right and the others are doing it wrong? Or could there be something else at work here?

Let me get down to what I think are some problems with the Law of Attraction, or at least the problems with how it is used.

The Law of Attraction is not a spiritual law

My first reservation about the LoA is that it is billed as a spiritual law but it’s not – it’s a law of the mind. It’s a tool for creating things, for manifesting stuff – and because it is about changing the world to suit an individual or group, it is inevitably rooted in personal identity, also known as ego. Think about it – if you want to change something, there must be an “I” who stands in opposition to what already is. It might be a very subtle and well-meaning “I”, but it’s enough to contain the seeds of later dissatisfaction and suffering. When we are creating things, changing things, we are affirming this separate self who has to “co-create” with God/Universe. This partnership sounds very attractive to one who has come out of victim mode, but it is rooted in separation. The Law of Attraction cannot ever give us what we really want, though it can give us a lot of fun and excitement and apparent reward as we try to get it.

The Law of Attraction medicates a condition of lack

My second reservation about the LoA is that it doesn’t ask the real questions about why we want success or a relationship or whatever. To put it bluntly, if we are trying to manifest money, love or success it is because we have a lack inside us that we are trying to fill. Achieving these things will bring some temporary relief, but at some time the void will be exposed again and suffering will return.

As long as there is an “I” trying to get something in order to feel better, we are in the realm of suffering and disappointment. The Law of Attraction can medicate this condition, but it can’t bring us the true success, freedom and love that we seek.

So what’s the solution?

The LoA is a useful tool for making life work better, but it’s not the end of the story because it can’t bring us what we are really looking for. What we need more than a law of mind is a law of Being – a law that says that whatever you are seeking, you are it already. Being requires nothing to be accomplished and nothing to be fixed. It does not need us to do anything to make us better. We don’t need healing or a better job or a more harmonious relationship. Being already is. To find true peace and love, just stop with all the healing and fixing and doing and searching.

This message goes against most of what we have been told we should do, so it can be quite threatening to the mind. Who are we if we are not chasing after something or trying to heal ourselves or fix something?

The path of Being is about letting go of all concepts of identity and our demands of how we think life should work out. It’s easy to get excited about The Secret and all the things we can have and the life we can supposedly create for ourselves. But when we grow weary of this … when the suffering remains despite everything looking so good on the surface … what then?

The next phase is to go beyond therapy, beyond coaching, beyond success to the discovery of Being and the enlightened Self you already are.

Resources

If you liked the viewpoints in this article, take a look at this video by the teacher Burt Harding:

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John’s central message in his writings is that certain of our troubles are brought about not because we are weak and are failing in some way but because we are ready to take a leap into the unknown. All that once served us has to be stripped away for a new and unimagined self to be born.

Even though John was writing of a spiritual stage of development, his insights into the Dark Night can change the way we experience loss and failure in our ordinary lives.

Could you be going through a Dark Night right now?

A dark night experience is one in which:

• the strategies that used to work for you no longer work
• you’ve tried everything you can to fix the situation, but it remains broken
• you feel powerless and abandoned
• the things that used to give your life meaning now feel empty and worthless

Not all these aspects have to be present, but the common thread is that what you are going through is more than just a spate of bad luck – it has shaken your sense of self and your place in the world. The pain you feel is a crisis of meaning and existence.

The way through the Dark Night

John’s advice for navigating the Dark Night is to recognise it for what it is and to stop running around trying to make it better. Don’t try to fix the situation, he says, because it is broken beyond repair. Just be present with yourself, in the midst of the loss of everything you have known. Give up asking God/Universe for stuff, give up trying to change reality to suit your needs. In the true Dark Night the only solution is to humbly be present with reality exactly as it is. You can still work to change things, but you have given up expectations of the outcome – you have given up your war with reality.

This is a profound message in this age of entitlement and self-empowerment where we are led to believe that ill-health or lack of success means we are failing in some way. We spend our time studying the self-help books and attending more ‘manifesting your dreams’ courses, hoping that one day we will get it right and receive the abundance we deserve. We don’t stop to consider that maybe our desire for success – even spiritual success – is an addiction that needs to be broken.

Ultimate acceptance

When the dark night descends, our illusions about who we are and what we need in order to be complete are shattered. In not trying to medicate our condition with money, with a new relationship, with spiritual feelings or whatever other thing we imagine we need, we discover a deep acceptance of life that is nothing less than union with God/Reality. The Buddha said that our suffering arises through running after things that please us and running away from things that cause us discomfort. The message of John of the Cross is the same – stop all the running and be present with what is.

When you can do this you will truly have everything you need.

Inspired Coaching … your home in the dark night

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When things get stressful, it’s very easy to get caught up in the drama of trying to find a solution that will end our discomfort. The mind goes into overdrive, but the more we think about the problem the more stressed we become. Clearly, thinking and stressing aren’t getting us anywhere!

So what’s the alternative?

We usually think of the brain as being the seat of intelligence, but did you know that the heart also has an intelligence? Research conducted by the HeartMath institute is showing evidence of a “heart-mind”, a form of connecting and unifying intelligence based on the heart. While the thinking mind is great at analysing and breaking things into components, the heart-mind works in a unifying, non-linear fashion. The heart’s intelligence can lift us out of the realm of problems to discover the innate peace and order behind any circumstance.

The heart-mind technique

Let’s try a little experiment. Take any feeling of stress that you might be having and just sit with it for a while. Notice the urge to jump up and try and fix the problem. But for now, let’s just not try to fix anything. Instead, let’s do the following simple process (read through it first, then do it by yourself):

1. Sit comfortably and close your eyes. For the next minute or so, just focus your attention on your heart centre – that’s the spot in the middle of your chest, just level with the heart. If your attention wanders away, just bring it back to this point. This focusing has a hypnotic effect that quietens the thinking mind and accesses the subconscious mind.
2. Now focus on your breathing as you breathe in to a count of 4 and out to a count of 4 (or any other number that is comfortable for you). Imagine you are breathing through that heart centre. What you are doing here is compounding your concentration and you are slowing the breath, which has some distinct physiological effects.
3. The third step is to activate a positive feeling. Let go of the counting, but keep your breath slow and deep and keep you attention on the heart area. Now imagine you are breathing in a feeling of appreciation. It could be appreciation for anything – a person, a beautiful scene in nature, or simply appreciation for this very breath. On your exhalation, imagine you are radiating this appreciation from your heart centre to the world around you. Keep doing this for as long as you like. You can bring in feelings of gratitude, love, ease and acceptance as well.

When you feel you have enjoyed this experience for long enough, just turn your attention back to how you were feeling when you began the exercise. I’m willing to bet that the stress and tension will be gone and the problem won’t seem so important anymore. And if you had any physical pain, I’m sure you’ll find that it is far more bearable.

Notice how in the beginning your mind was trying to tell you not to bother with this silly exercise because it wasn’t going to help. I love the way the mind interferes like this. But if you actually tried the exercise, you will have experienced how problems resolve automatically simply by accessing a state of wellbeing. The Institute of HeartMath has shown that this state can be measured by electrical and chemical changes within the body. Science is at last showing that we really can let go of obsessive thinking and discover the power of heart.

For more information, check out my friend Alan’s site www.heartmathcapetown.co.za.

PS … I am now incorporating the HeartMath approach into all my coaching and therapy. I also use the technique as a rapid meditation or self-hypnosis process. Contact me to experience it yourself.

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Video: EFT for war veterans

This is the video that inspired me to learn EFT. I’m sure it can do the same for you.

Call me if you need help with post-traumatic stress.

Read more about EFT.

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EFT tapping points on the body

EFT (emotional freedom techniques) is a mind/body healing modality that resolves the negative beliefs and traumatic memories underlying physical and emotional symptoms. It works by the simple action of tapping with the fingers on acupuncture meridian endpoints while thinking about the negative emotion or memory. This calms the nervous system and breaks the cycle of negative thoughts and alarming reactions that are triggered whenever you experience a particular stimulus.

The best way to learn EFT is by attending a workshop or going for a session with a trained therapist. But instruction on the basic use of EFT is freely available on the Internet, and there are some really great resources out there that will give you a good introduction to the technique (See the resources at the bottom of the page). The purpose of this article is not to teach the EFT protocol but just to give a summary. At the end of the article you will find a link to the

EFT Manual created by EFTUniverse.com.

Here is the protocol for the EFT ‘basic recipe’:

1. Identify the pain, discomfort or limiting belief.
2. Give it a discomfort rating out of 10 (where 10 is maximum discomfort)
   

   EFT tapping points on the hand

3. Create a setup statement that describes the problem: “Even though I … I love and accept myself.”For example: Even though I got anxious when I had to deliver that presentation, and my heart was racing and I thought I was going to faint, I love and accept myself.
4. Tap on the meridian points while thinking about the discomfort or negative belief.At each point, think of the discomfort and remember the troubling situation. Notice where you feel it in the body. As you are tapping, notice how this sensation changes. Follow it, tapping as you go.
5. Test the discomfort level on the setup statement again by giving it a score out of 10. Keep doing further rounds of tapping if necessary to bring it down to an appropriate level of comfort.

That’s the basic recipe – simple, but effective. The real magic comes in when you learn how to ‘chase the pain’ by following the shifting sensations and emotions in the body.

For a more detailed explaination, visit the EFTUniverse.com site and download the EFT Mini Manual.

Or watch this great video of the EFT tapping points.

More EFT articles on Inspired Coaching: - Emotional freedom through EFT

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I am very excited to be launching a new website focusing specifically on weight loss. Here’s the introduction to my no-diet solution for permanent weight loss:

“Are you tired of dieting and seeing no results? Do you feel powerless to resist those foods that you know are just not good for you? Then it’s time to resolve your weight loss issue at its core – your inner mind.

“We are going to help you lose weight the natural way using weight-loss hypnotherapy, coaching and other highly effective methods of creating deep change. So stop punishing yourself with methods that don’t work and let’s get started on real and lasting transformation.”

There … I know you’ll be all fired up after reading that … so why not go and check out the site and find out more about the no-diet solution to permanent weight loss.

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This is a case study from EFTUniverse.com:

PTSD or Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is defined as an anxiety disorder that can develop after exposure to a terrifying event or ordeal in which grave physical harm occurred or was threatened.

Traumatic events that may trigger PTSD include violent personal assaults, natural or human-caused disasters, accidents, or military combat. People with PTSD have persistent frightening thoughts and memories of their ordeal and feel emotionally numb, especially with people they were once close to. They may experience sleep problems, feel detached or numb, or be easily startled.

Read the full story on how EFT can resolve anxiety in PTSD at  http://www.eftuniverse.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=9084

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As I write this, the financial markets are in turmoil and there is the fear that we might be heading for another recession. The Middle East has been in an uprising since the beginning of the year, and there have been violent demonstrations in Greece, Europe and the UK. What’s going on?

On a global scale and also on a personal scale, some sort of shift seems to be happening. Talking with friends and colleagues I get the sense that lots of people are in states of fear and uncertainty about their work, their finances, and their relationships. I have felt it myself, so I have spent time contemplating it and working on processes and thought-changes we can put into effect to navigate troubling times.

1. Recognise the nature of the problem

When we look at the events in the world one observation we might make is that there seems to be a common theme – any lies, untruths, power imbalances and divisions are being brought to the surface and exposed. Many of our old ways of thinking, doing business and governing people are proving to be no longer sustainable and are simply falling down. To safely negotiate these changes we can begin with looking at our own fears and asking where we are out of alignment with our true nature.

Is any of your fear or discomfort based on thinking you will become a victim or that you won’t have enough? Notice the subconscious beliefs in lack that are being exposed. Expect any thought or belief that is based on duality and not aligned with unity, truth and natural abundance to be brought to the surface so that it can be re-evaluated.

2. Stop trying to fix everything

Some things can easily be resolved using our logic and problem-solving abilities, but sometimes we get into situations that resist our efforts to fix or change them. If your business is caught in a recession, for example, there are the necessary practical steps you need to take, but at some point you might find your energy sinking as you run out of ideas for how to remedy the situation. No matter how much you think about the situation and try to fix it, the problem stays a problem. At this point, the thinking mind has moved from being a helpful tool into part of the problem itself.

The conscious, critical mind is a wonderful aspect of ourselves that has resulted in all the marvels of modern civilisation. However, it has one drawback – it can only function by comparing and contrasting things that are different from one another. It needs to separate things into components that it can hold and examine. It only functions in the realm of duality and division. The mind simply can’t apprehend wholeness because there is nothing for it to hold onto. If everything in the world is green, there will be no concept of green or even of colour. To behold green, there must be red or blue or something different. The mind can’t go where division is not, but this is precisely where we need to go if we are to navigate this shift.

When we keep fretting at a problem we are trying to bring unity to an issue using a tool that can only work with duality. The alternative to this is unitive apprehension, but the thinking mind can’t go there. Essentially, what we have to do is move from thinking-mind to heart-mind.

3. Get into a state of flow

So, how to get out of mind and into heart?

If you’ve learned EFT from me or anyone else, then doing a few rounds of tapping on any issue is one of the quickest ways to stop opposing a problem and allowing it to resolve, returning one to a state of flow and appreciation.

Another way to get into heart-based flow is by using the breathing and visualisation exercises developed by the Institute of HeartMath. As people do these exercises, a factor called their heartbeat variability goes from a relatively disordered state to a highly ordered state known as coherence, and this can be measured very easily using a heartrate monitor.

The following simple technique can be used whenever you are feeling stressed to quickly bring you out of chaos into coherence and flow:

1. Sitting comfortably, bring your awareness to your heart centre and gently keep it focused there for a while. (The heart-centre is in the centre of your chest, in line with your heart).
2. Now begin breathing in to a count of 5 and out to a count of 5. (It doesn’t have to be 5 – it can be any number that’s comfortable). As you are breathing, keep your awareness on your heart centre.
3. When your breathing has stabilised in a deep, gentle rhythm, begin breathing in the quality of appreciation and breathing out the same appreciation. It can be appreciation for anything – a person, a beautiful scene in nature, or it can be simple appreciation for this moment. (After a while you can expand from appreciation to gratitude or any other positive emotion).

Continue cycling positive emotions while paying attention to the breath for as long as you choose. You will find that this quickly creates a deep sense of wellbeing in which things that seemed to be problems no longer have such a hold on you. You have moved from thinking mind into heart-mind and into divine flow. (Tip: If your negative thoughts are powerful and keep on intruding, try breathing in the negativity and breathing out any positive feeling. By breathing in the negative we end our opposition to it.)

Now, holding onto this state of flow, consider your challenges again. Are they still such a problem? Can you see new solutions, new options? Or if there are no immediate solutions, can you simply resolve to live with the discomfort and not to attach to it? This, ultimately, is what enlightenment is all about – being at peace with yourself, even if things around you are falling apart. Try it now and show yourself it really is possible.

Need some help with this? Simply contact me and let’s get out of worrying and into flow.

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Recently a friend complained to me that he wasn’t happy with his sales job because the pay was low and nobody was making commissions. The problem was that the targets for earning commssions were set too high, so even the top performers were earning nothing more than their basic salary.

I asked my friend what his plan was and he said he was working hard in the hope that he would get a promotion, which would give him a little more money. But from our discussion so far it seemed that this company was already taking more from their staff than what they were giving and that this ‘hoping’ for a promotion was a very weak position.

I encouraged my friend to move into a stronger, more proactive position by asking him what someone who was really confident might do. There were several options:

• He could go and talk to management and explain how the salespeople were frustrated, and offer a solution (in this way he would get their attention and demonstrate his commitment to making the company a success)
• He could realise the company wasn’t going to change and he could then use the time to study and become a great salesperson, so that when the time was right he could leave for a better job
• He could simply decide to start looking for a new job right now

All of the above options are stronger than simply ‘hoping’ for things to improve. Hoping is really just a way of covering up a sense of our own inadequacy or fear. We are passing the buck, hoping God or the universe or the boss or whoever will reward us, when in fact the world is simply waiting for us to stand up and declare who we are. Standing up will involve facing our fears, but in this way we are growing rather than simply covering up the problem with wishful thinking.

Move from hope to intent

The key to solving my friend’s dilemma involved moving from hope to intention. What did he really want, and how did he intend expressing this intention? With this new attitude he felt empowered and back in control of his life. Control doesn’t mean gettting exactly what you want – after all, he might speak to management about the  problems and receive a cold response. But at least after taking this action he will be more clear on the next step – and with this clarity comes a sense of purpose and meaning.

Next time you find yourself hoping for something, catch yourself and see how you might change that weak stance into a stronger and more intentful position. When you have intention you can develop a plan, and with a plan you are able to turn any eventuality into a success.

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