The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it. Eckhart Tolle quote

Hypnotised by appearances – why you should never judge yourself by your life circumstances

Did you wake up this morning feeling low? Or have you been through a slump recently?

I’ve realised that when I get into a slump it’s usually because I’ve been focusing on the circumstances of my life and judging myself harshly because things aren’t going the way I want them to. I fall into the trap of thinking that “things not working out” means there is something wrong with me or that I am failing in some way. After all, it’s how we’ve been taught to think – if something is broken, we must fix it, including ourselves!

I’ve now learnt that this is a huge trap. You see, if we’re always fixing ourselves or trying to mend a situation, we are operating on the belief that things really are broken and that there’s something wrong with ourselves or the world. We are operating from lack rather than from fullness and abundance.

The solution we are looking for can never emerge from a problem state or from a focusing on what’s wrong. We become mesmerised by events and circumstances and assume they have to be fixed, when all that’s really required is a shift in focus – from circumstances and appearances to the inner truth of our already-existing wellbeing and abundance. We’ve got to begin feeling good even before circumstances change to reflect this.

And yes, doing this can be a challenge. Our judgements about reality are extremely powerful and we remain hypnotised by appearances and our conclusions about them. So here’s a process that can help:

Activating heart-intelligence

  1. Stop all judgements about your life and what you have or don’t have
  2. Bring your attention to the area of your heart and imagine you are breathing in and out from this point. Let the breath be slow, deep and even.
  3. Find one thing in your life to appreciate, and breathe this feeling of appreciation in and out while focusing on the heart.
  4. Now, from a place of appreciation and inner calm, look at your situation and allow a more helpful attitude to arise. You can ask solution-focused questions like, “What would I love to do?”, “What can I give?”, “Who can I reach out to?”, “Where can I make a difference?”, and “What wants to happen?”

This process activates your heart-intelligence and directs it to begin finding solutions based on fullness and a state of having. No matter how dire a situation, there is always a solution of some kind. It might be very simple and involve just one step in a new direction. But now you are walking in the energy of fullness rather than of lack. Your external circumstances might take a while to change, but inwardly you are resonating with possibility, appreciation and openness. You are demonstrating abundance in the face of lack. And with that attitude, things can only get better.

Try it now and see 🙂

Get my latest coaching offers and specials

When days are dark and happiness escapes you, do one thing in favour of your values.
I am enough, I have enough, I am already everything I seek

Expert life coaching and executive coaching in Cape Town and around the world. Contact Russel now

0 replies

Leave a Reply

Want to join the discussion?
Feel free to contribute!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.